Yesterday was my last therapy session with my long-term MST/PTSD therapist. She helped me through nearly four years of “stuff” …… some of it hellish, some of it hard, all of it a learning experience. Enticing me out of long entrenched comfort zones that were no longer beneficial to me, was probably not that easy. I’m not losing her as a therapist because anything negative happened. Life circumstances and my own progress have put me in a position to move on to other areas in my therapeutic journey. It’s time to joust with other dragons now. I am surprised at how emotional I am right now though. I feel a deep sense of loss. I wonder how often others who have had to change therapists experience this? Don’t get me wrong. I’m so grateful for her. She heard me. She saw me. She helped me. I am darn proud of my own work and progress. But gosh, I’m going to miss her. Next month I will start with a new therapist, and we will be doing ACT (Acceptance and commitment therapy). I was introduced to ACT when I was up at Tomah, but now I will be doing it beginning to end, in a structured format. The end goal for ACT is to help me learn how to move my personal goals toward my personal beliefs. So, there’s a lot of “doing” in ACT, not just yakking about it. I’ve also been working on DBT (Dialectical behavioral therapy) on my own. DBT deals with self-destructive behaviors, and how to cope with life events in a more healthy and positive way. Anyway….I’m just surprised at how I am feeling right now…..proud, grateful, sad and a little scared…..and I am working on not judging my feelings and making room for this. 💜

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